Tears of Joy

This evening I was able to lay on the couch and read my book while Bryan worked on the basement toy box project and Anna PLAYED BY HERSELF. Those of you with easy children, not children like the kind whole series of books are written (think Ramona, Junie B, Clementine...), might not quite understand the magnitude of this event. I've been dreaming of this day. I cried when I watched her talking to her dolls. I cried because I was so happy to see her engaging in her toys and using her imagination.

I don't know what made playing by herself so difficult. The dyspraxia - she didn't know how to play? The high energy - she couldn't calm herself enough to sit and focus? Her age - she just wasn't mature enough to play by herself?

I don't know what's caused the change. This wasn't the first day, but seeing her in the basement on the couch while Bryan was in a different part of the basement working, and I was upstairs made it really clear that she can do this - she can play by herself. I think the start of playing by herself has been a combination of things:
1) OT has helped her find her balance, her threshold. She is able to sit and focus so much more now than she ever could. We also use a brushing technique to help calm her each night at bed and when she starts getting physically agitated and hyper.
2) Pre-school has helped her both learn new things and play with friends in a smaller and calmer atmosphere than daycare. I think since the craziness is reduced, she can focus on her activities a little more.
3) She's maturing and getting older. Maybe it was finally her time.

Don't think I don't enjoy playing with Anna, because I love myself a few games of Candy Land and feeding Pink Baby her bottle, but the energy behind her constant demands for attention and control can be very exhausting. It's just a nice break from always monitoring, anticipating, and fighting for balance. It's so normal. It feels good to write that so I'm going to do it again. It's so normal.

Today I am thankful for:
1. a loving daughter
2. a daughter that can "read" with expression. Knuffle Bunny Too is a favorite right now.
3. a great book, French Lessons by Ellen Sussman